"The Republican War on Women"... Are you kidding? The Republican war on women?
Oh, that’s right. Republicans
hate women. Republicans don’t have mothers, wives, or daughters- we all know
that. Republicans don’t have live birth the way Democrats do. Oh, no. Didn’t
you know that Republicans are all men? Republicans clone themselves. And they
use only cells from old, white males, which produce more old white males. Yes,
that’s true. They come out of the test tube approximately seventy years old,
they make millions and billions of dollars which they put in trust for their
wrinkled, ancient clones.
Democrats, on the other hand,
reproduce by live birth like other mammals, but Democratic women don’t want to
be punished with babies, as our president so nicely put it. They want birth
control, and they want it now - free. Haven’t you heard them clamor for it? Oh,
was it just that one lady lawyer? What was her name? Fuck? I think that was it.
So, they’re getting’ it. We’re
all going to pay for their birth control pills, because they don’t want to mess
around with condoms. But wait a minute! Shouldn’t someone explain to them that
birth control pills leave them wide open to AIDS? That’s right, have you
forgotten? AIDS. It’s still here, with a rising number of female victims.
Do you know any females? If
you do - well, of course, they’re Democrats. There is no such thing as a
Republican woman. If you know one, explain to her that condoms can prevent AIDS
by catching the little buggers that produce it in a little rubber throw-away
sack. But women on the pill don’t need ’em. Women on the pill spread their legs
and welcome the little parasites in. Of course, if your woman has only one man,
and that man never has anybody else, man or woman, well, then they’re safe. That’s
called monogamy. When was the last time you ran across a monogamous woman?
So the Democrat party is now
promoting AIDS for women. The Democrats don’t give a damn about women as women.
They care about them only as votes.
Ever wonder why the
Democrats, so in favor of women, give money, aid, support and succor to regimes
that abuse women? Don’t let them leave the house, don’t let them go to school,
allow them to be stoned for committing adultery, the very same thing we make
easy for our women by giving them free pills? Foreign women must not be real
women. Hey, maybe they’re Republicans.
And it’s not just over there
that we support the abuse of women. If a Muslim woman in the United States is
beaten by her husband, well, that’s no crime, because it’s part of her
religion. Oh, yes, judges here… they don’t want to interfere with the Muslim
religion. That’s the Muslim men’s own business, and if the Koran says they can
beat their wives, well, who’s to say nay?
I’ll tell you who. Some
old-fashioned men – the kind who open doors, pay for dinner, help you on with
your coat… those guys. Remember them? You know who was one of them? W. Yeah, Doubya
was one of those guys who would put up his dukes and defend a damsel in
distress. And not just the ones that looked like him. He spoke out when women
were killed by the lot in arenas. He insisted that girls be allowed to go to
school in Afghanistan. That’s all over now. The Americans are leaving, and
those girls, who had a taste of freedom, are seeing their schools closed, and
themselves sent back …. Oh, just a couple thousand years. But what the hell,
they’re just girls.
Do you know what they do to
women in Africa? You don’t want to know, and neither does our government. We
don’t give a good God damn about women who don’t look like our women. Who
knows? Maybe they like being castrated.
Speaking of the war on women,
there are some Republican women -unnatural, of course - there can’t be a
Republican woman any more than there can be a Republican African-American. A
Republican woman is an unnatural creature that should be stomped to death with
big boots like a rattlesnake. Goodbye Sarah Palin, we’ll put you out of your
misery. And oh, yes, maybe you didn’t hear Bill what’s his name-not Clinton-
Clinton, bless his soul loves all women. No, it was that other Bill. Maher, I
think his name is, who called Laura Ingram a cunt? Was he the one who played a
filthy song when he introduced Sarah when she gave him an interview? You all
laughed. Ha, ha, ha. Even you women. You Democratic women that is, the only
real women.
Well, what the hell. Women
don’t want to be women anymore. Not real women, anyway. Real women want to be
men. They want to ship their kids off to Federal indoctrination centers, which
Obama mentioned in his State of the Union address. Compulsory pre-kindergarten
for everyone, whether you like it or not. Well, who cares if your kid’s brought
up by somebody else. By that time he’s no longer yours anyway. He’s Obama’s. They
sing hymns to him.
Not so bad, you say, could be
worse. And it is. They’re told to spy on you, their parents. Yep. If Mommy and
Daddy do anything on this list, you come right here to school and tell them all
about it. Tell your teacher. Your teacher will report them up the line, and if
she doesn’t, well…. You know… that could be a criminal offense.
Mommy, didn’t you used to be
the boss? Didn’t you used to decide what little Betty ate for lunch, and what
little Freddy wore to school? Not anymore, you don’t, because you know, you
don’t know what’s good for them, and the school does.
No, Mommy, you are no longer
the decider. You’ve been freed of all that needless thinking about such trivia.
Free to go out and maybe even get a job bossing men. Now that sounds like a lot
more fun, doesn’t it? And who cares if your kids don’t listen to you anymore,
if they tell you what you can and can’t do in your own home. If you don’t like
it, you don’t have to have kids. I hear there’s free birth control. Come and
get it!
And one more thing. The Draft
is coming.
