Shove It

I’ve been trying all week to write to you about the Great Divide – how Dems and Reps can’t talk to each other anymore – you know all about it. At the same time I’ve been trying to accommodate all of you who want me to pick on the Reps as much as I do the Dems. And theoretically, I do.

But people! I can’t do it, because every time I start, the Dems outstrip the Reps in the “divisiveness” division. Reps will talk to Dems, but the Dems won’t talk back. They shut up their lips in a tight, tense smile and they do not respond. If forced to, they explode. I’ve seen it over and over again and I can’t get it out of my mind, or my message.

I recently met a woman – a Hillaryite – who found out her lawyer was a Republican and took her business away to somebody else. Nothing had changed about the kind, accommodating gent, except his politics in the eye of the beholder, and that changed everything for her.

Folks, you’re the party of labels. Of stigmatizing, stereotyping, labels. You want to know the kinky little details of the past fornications of every contributor to everybody’s gene pool. Until then, you can’t make a decision on him. Yes, I said him. I’m through with he-sheing. You’re all men to me until you take your pants off. I’m no sexist.

I’m no racist either. But you are. To the nth degree. Yesterday I was threatened with race war if Obama doesn’t win. You know what that makes me want to do? It makes me want to harness up the elephant and go down and vote for his party – the party of racial blindness. The party who has put a Black in the most important post in the United States government, the Secretary of State. And another before her.

I am not responsible for slavery. My ancestors were not responsible for slavery. They were Northerners, a quarter of a million of whom died to free the slaves. You hear that? DIED to free the slaves. I shouldn’t pay reparations, I should get them.

Neither should the Italians, or the Jews or any of the other people that came here long after slavery was abolished, who had no hand in it, nothing to do with it. If you want to go after somebody, how about going after the descendents of the people who captured those primitives and put them in the holds of ships to die disgusting deaths. Let’s find them. I do believe they’re mostly British. You WASPs out there. It’s YOU! Empty your pockets, people, and pay up. Anybody bragging about his early origins is suspect.

Now let’s talk about these poor descendents of the actual persons who were subjected to the pain, the fear, the indignity of everything that went on in the abominable practice of slavery. Who are they? They’re the lucky Africans who aren’t in Africa, but are in the US of A , with every much right to the American dream as anybody else. They’re dictating culture, filling up the broadband with black faces, going to college, winning Oscars, being loved and admired by all. And, oh yes, being Secretaries of State. And, hey, running for President. Have they had to face bigots? Who hasn’t?

And here's a little secret. The survivors of the horrible passage from Africa, the fiendish forced labor, and sub-human living arrangements are stronger, smarter and healthier for the Darwinian culling. The living, so-called African-Americans, are not victims. They have been elevated by brutal historical forces. Check out the NBA.

There are poor people in this country. We can and should take care of them. Does it matter what color their skin is? Apparently, to you, it does. That makes you, not me, a racist.

And now, the worst has happened. If Obama doesn’t become President, what will the world think of us? The Blacks will riot. We’ll have race wars.

Well let me tell you, people, you’re not going to shove a Socialist down my throat no matter how much I love chocolate. I’m fighting back. Harder, because you threatened me. You threatened me with race war if I don’t vote your way. Well fuck that. In the words of our cowboy President, “Bring it on!”

A man of the land, who never votes, said to me, “Guess I’m gonna have to go out and vote for the old, white guy.” He doesn’t take kindly to being threatened. And neither do I, folks.

It would be nice if we could elect a Black because he was the best man for the job, but it would not be nice to elect one just because he’s black.

I do not want Barack Obama to be president, even though he’s black and beautiful, because he is also a Socialist. I don’t want universal health insurance. Universal health care I’m all for. Take care of sick people at the door. Don’t throw away money on elderly Jews who go to the doctor eight days a week because it’s free, and swallow a ton of poison because it’s subsidized. Don’t make me pay for somebody else’s fertility problems after they've aborted healthy babies back when they were fit. Forget about my shelling out for sex-change operations for criminals. Everybody is not entitled to, nor does everybody need, everything everybody else does. Take a little time to sort it out. But no, that’s not the Socialist way. The Socialist way is “mow ’em all down at once. It’s cheaper that way. You get a lot of stuff you don’t want, but that’s how we deal with vast numbers.”

I don’t want everyone to be forced to go to college because that’s the way we teach reading now. If you want to learn some serious science or get a so-called liberal arts education you’ll have to wait till you're thirty in a post-post-graduate situation.

I don’t want to sign myself over to the UN or any of the other thug organizations Barack thinks were ordained by God.

And you know what, guys? I don’t want to suddenly be swamped by a disproportionate number of people trying to do something for “their people” instead of for all of us. We’re all supposed to be their people, but I see that’s not how you see it.

When I asked a Liberal once, why Bush didn’t get credit for Condoleeza Rice, he said, “What has she done for her people?” Folks, I found that infuriating. Condoleeza Rice thinks that I, myself, am her people, just as much as the Black guy down the block. That’s America.

I have plenty against the Republicans. They’re stupid. They won’t take up weapons against their own. Instead, they try to appease them. They gave away the store to get Dems on their side.

You don’t hear Republicans saying they won’t buy from Democrats. It’s un-American. Republicans are too polite. It’s unsportsmanlike.

When Republicans tell the truth you claim they’re talking dirty. They’re talking dirty if they say BO has no experience, if they say he’s got radical friends, if they say he went to a church that spewed hatred. I say that every time the Democrats put up an ad that pictures McCain and Bush, the Republicans should put up an ad featuring Barack and the Reverend. That, is what I call fair.

Democrats, on campuses, on highways, and in towns, tear down Republican signs. Republicans do not tear down Democratic signs. And you know goddam well how the liberal students of America treat conservative visitors to their campuses. I suppose that’s because they know they are right, and are therefore immune from the laws of decency, of courtesy, and even of our land.

The Republicans have ruined this country with eight years of compromising, or worse, giving in to, the Democrats. Barack wants to reach across the aisle and grab the Republicans kicking and screaming, back across it and into his cell meeting. There’s no compromise. There isn’t even any acknowledgment of another valid position. In other words, he’s just like you, my sweet Demographic. He’ll get together with them for the Photo Op, to prove how open-minded he is, but that’s it. Just like you. He’s not interested in conversation. Let’s eat and get out of here. These Republicans have a funny smell.

People! Can’t you think for yourselves? Is there absolutely nothing you find wrong with the world Barack Obama wants for us? Nothing? Is there nothing about the notion of freedom that you like? Cornell, my alma mater, used to have written on our student ID cards, the words, “Freedom with Responsibility.” You guys have taken the freedom out of it and only want to deal with the reponsiblity. Worse, you feel responsible for everything, even for what God hath wrought.

And you want me to feel responsible for the inconvenient truth that Islamic Militants have declared war on my country and have announced their desire to kill us all. That’s supposed to be my fault, so I ought to go on bended knee and apologize.

Barack thinks AchMyDinnerJacket is his friend. Well, he may be Barry’s friend, I wouldn’t doubt it, but he’s not mine. I want to squash the little bugger, not buy him dinner. He’s demonstrated how good his word is, over and over again, and you still want to talk? He laughs at you. Sure he wants Barack in power. He sees he’s a simpleton.

Ooops. I just felt a lightening of the load as more or you clicked away. No, I don’t think Barry’s dumb. I think he’s got quite a grasp of Chicago politics. But I don’t think it translates.

And I’m not sure Barry wants it to translate. Maybe he wants to be one of the players, just like he was in Chicago, reaping the benefits. “I’ll make a deal with you Achy, you get this, I get that. The American people? Don’t worry about them. I can take care of them.” Barack is a worldist. He’d prefer being president of the world to being president of just one section of it. A section he’s not particularly attached to, having, as he says, such international roots (Was he really born in Hawaii or was it perhaps a little off-shore?) and experiences growing up. He feels himself a citizen of the world. I want a citizen of my country, because I think I need protection from the world. America, since her birth, has always been better than the world. Hear that, you self-deprecating worms? Your country is, and always was, better than any other country on Earth.

Don’t bother me with your litany of Yankee sins. Or praise of Sweden or Iceland. Iceland has re-authorized the killing of whales. That makes them murderers in my book. America has, at times, sinned. But America is bigger than her flawed components. America is her Constitution – the acknowledged "number one" of civilized and civilizing documents.

You people are like kittens who trust everything, and go out at night and get gobbled up by coyotes. You feel so “nice” inside yourselves, because you’ve talked yourselves into believing it, that you think everybody is just as “nice” inside as you are. Well you better watch out, because it’s true. They’re just as “nice” as you, and you, way deep down, are nowhere near as nice as you think. You’ve got the same balance of good and evil as everybody else. You’ve scrunched your evil down, you think, but it comes out everywhere. Out of your mouth, out of your eyes, out of your skin. You’ve reserved the bad part of you for Republicans. Your wrath is centered soley on them, with the Big Bad Bush as their mascot. You are totally consumed with biting your own tail, part of your own body (politic). Whether you like it or not; these are your countrymen.

Consider, those of you who are still reading, removing all labels, being blind to color except on clothes, and seeing your fellow Americans as they are, perhaps for the first time in your life. Refuse to be a bigot.